Teaching-pack: Silence, Head & Clarity

As consciousness we must sort of give thanks to life’s way of rolling us up on shore wherever the ocean wants to take us. Delicately, Deeply, Honestly, Freely – yet bound to the nakedness of our deepest vulnerability. Are we anything but spectators to this big game? Do we decide how to feel or what to feel? The answer is no – not with the total release of the controller, the manipulator of life…

It leaves us Facing. Facing with gratitude, embracing in the most intimate sweetness, the outskirts of our human experience in the crushing waves hitting every cliff or rock we ever built to not Feel and Be with the depth of our own experience – our separation from God. And what a shame. For Love was always in wait in our meeting with these places. For we Are that Love. Even in our deepest and darkest corners – we are the Reality standing to outshine the hidden, the forbidden, the suppressed, the angry, the broken and abandoned.

We are the Light at the core of All of that. And in saying Yes. In being human – by choice of Heart, of the Deepest Commitment to This in gratitude and appreciation for our human experience – in any given moment and no matter what we meet, we are filled to the brim with the sweetness of The Fact ::: of This.

This is It. This is our human reality. This is our Now, our Moment, our Blessing. And who are we to object to that? – no matter the colour of the rainbow in that moment. Whether grey and misty or beamingly bright…

We Just don’t have the luxury of preference. Is there any other way, than to meet everything to the barebones fact of our vulnerability? I haven’t found one. Not one I would dare call accurate or to the point at least…

With Love, Pema

So I am bringing this up, because it needs our FULL honesty in this emergence. It needs our willingness to take responsibility for Stopping and Turning to Face it by the development of Compassion towards ourselves in this place of need and hunger – rather than the continued unconscious playing out of our inner rejection and unwillingness to SEE it, while it thrives to drive our movements, feelings, thoughts and actions – or STOP them from appearing in plain sight.

We need to get Real Honest with the fact, that this shadow is a PART of us, as long as we harbor that inner separation from Her. In that acknowledgement, there can be Humility and Self-responsibility.

The moment the shadow appears inside, we grasp at Love – or reject it altogether. We do it out of fear of meeting ourselves and in hope to be rid of our own shadow. It is a movement which creates Quite the unfortunate manifestation of ourselves. In other words, we need to Get Real and Real Humble about the fact of its appearance in us.

What can take place here, is that we start generating some Real Awareness about our need for True Acceptance and honesty around this appearance of the shadow inside.

What we are used to doing to ourselves and each other, is judge Hardly the appearance of this Shadow. Something which keeps it suppressed and out of Sight.

In short we judge ourselves for not being perfect. And as the result, we not only cut ourselves off from the possibility of landing safely with All that we Are, but we also falsely stamp ourselves with whatever degree of perfection has appeared as a part of our work so far. To say it straight, it makes a backwards loop inside, causing the Beauty we HAVE unfolded in us to land in the hands of the “inner bastard” with either a growing collapse or growing carelessness, until we Stand Up to Face it in ourselves.

To Face and be Honest about our shadow, is equal to beholding Immensely much more courage, humility, realness and honesty, than our hiding behind a still-point of whatever Shine or dwelling in the collapse can Ever be. In this lies the Demand for our Courage and Honesty in Vulnerability. That we step into responsibility for the grounds of our own being and being together with the agreement to dissolve this inner hardness.

If we are dishonest to ourselves around the fact of when the shadow appears in us, then we naturally mis-use any appearance of Love in front of us – as the result. We part from the ground of BEing, Looking Away and either display carelessness seeping in own inner rejection or plain out spill the negativity of the shadow from an unconscious and non-responsible place. In short we try to make other people responsible for facing what we need to in ourselves. This is neither sustainable nor trust-worthy. We can need each other for the reflection at times, but the basic responsibility for Seeing and wrapping ourselves up in our straying from Reality – it ultimately lies with ourselves. Both men and women.

We have to Land this responsibility for dealing with our Shadow within our own Holding and Care combined with our straightness of self-responsibility. Both for ourselves – as the loss of our self-rejection and judgment TOWARDS our shadow – AND for each other.

The lack of okayness and responsibility around the shadow leaves No Room for vulnerability. Neither in or around you. The un-faced shadow operates on trying to shut off or down Vulnerability, Love and Truth. The obstacle towards what is Calling to emerge in tis time and field is not the shadow itself. It is your  judgment OF the shadow – the lack of willingness to sensibly Hold  and be Honest around it, as a part of your revelation of the darkness of Her. Everyone needs to step up to the responsibility for dissolving this inner judgement/hardness towards their own shadow and as the result end the projection outwards of responsibility for this part.

It is Beautiful to need other people, but the Need has to be Real. And the Only way it CAN be real, in our BEing here for and with each other, is rooted in our Meeting and Allowing Love to Hold it All. In the honesty of how we Truly Feel.

Our shadow is not a problem. But it IS something requiring our coming to Full Commitment to taking Care of our Grounds. We Fear it, because it frankly speaking is the least beautiful thing about us, but if we can turn and change ourselves towards meeting it compassionately and honestly in ourselves, then we can Truly Stand with the vulnerable situation of the most raw and naked places of needing compassion and realness with each other.

The happening of fear in the body must by far be The Sensory experience which is best able to freeze our body in its track. Fear is as such a stop-button on Love, on Life, which pauses, freezes, for a while, until we have presenced its transportation through our nervous system.

I witness many who are meeting and experiencing this happening in this time. The freezing of the system, which in many ways render them helpless. Good news – there is a Key.

First off, the awareness of and honesty to the feeling of fear must be recognized. Owned. It must be Seen in the light of full honesty and all strategies of attempts to create security through control, through acting ones way out of the underlying feeling must be caught in its track. We must reduce the impact from and isolate the feeling – so as to come into a Clear View of it.

Once the feeling of fear is in a Clear view, we have reestablished our vulnerability and thereby Touch ALL the way to the bottom. The greatest challenge from here is the ability to stay open to and explore the feeling all the way into its strongest and most delicate details.

The sense of fear in the body can arrive as a whole range of strength. The strength of it is what determines whether we experience its occurrence as fear or in its stronger manifestation – as terror.

You are Bound to experience this occurrence inside you, when you meet up with Her. If there was no fear, you can be sure that you would already be One with Her. So to proclaim “I am not afraid” is by far the most foolish expression of bravery. End the identification with fear and become brave in the face of it – instead of clinging to the notion, that not feeling fear is equal to bravery. It is a grave misunderstanding and twist of believing the occurrence of fear to be equal to weakness. The fact is – the opposite is true. Being brave is to not be afraid of being afraid.

The sensation of fear – in its clear view and full honesty – is one of ice in the veins. The very opposite of Love, which varies from warmth to fire.

If you trace the feeling of fear back to its origin – in its most raw sensory form, it is shaped like needles inside. Icy needles. It stings and is very unpleasant. But… That is all it is. and it is this knowledge which we must remember in the face of it, as it travels through our insides. We must meet the feeling in its most naked sense.

The absolute worst thing we can do in the moment of fear rolling through, is to take off. As consciousness. Do Not activate your mind, looking for a story. We must go opposite to the attempt to get-away, to escape into the mind by trying to find a reason for it, and we must crawl even closer and all the way up to its happening in the body. THIS is the movement of taking care and of taking responsibility. When we can’t own fear in the body, it sets off into forceful use of energy and when we can’t accept the nakedness of the feeling, of course, as always, it becomes a seed of manipulation as well.

In the moment of fear arising. Do NOT make the choice to speak. Focus. Focus Ever deeper until you are holding and passing this icy occurrence in your body.

If you in the moment of trying to focus are asked “what is wrong?”, from your surroundings, do not answer. The cause is simply, that if you start speaking, chances are that you will be distracted and relentlessly tossed into mind and trying to explain away why you feel how you feel. The why is not important. The taking care in that moment is. If you are around people who can be with you in that state, then Beautiful, if not, then it is not the time to explain to the people around you what is going on. In this moment, you and you alone is what matter and your passing will require your full Holding and self-focused Love.

The experience in itself is unpleasant and we can laugh at it afterwards, although we can stand a bit shocked at how strong this feeling of fear can actually BE and how much it can rattle us in the moment of its appearance.

You do however have what it takes – and now the key also – to handle this occurence in your body, connected with the drop of your being into your deeper rawness.

In my experience, fear Never has an actual cause – other than itself. We may Think that what Triggers the fear is the actual reason why we are afraid, but it never is. Whatever we seem to be afraid of, when fear is activated and reflects into minds thought, it ALWAYS is a run-down straight back to the fact, that whatever sets us off as triggers, in fact is a deeper Call from Her and requirement for us to surrender deeper. So subtly we Always know, when we need to die deeper into Her – and the “what we think we fear” may be the alley to where we subconsciously Know we Have to surrender. In this way, it is never the thing which we mentally project the fear on, in itself. It is the level of surrender it requires from us to succeed in the meeting with whatever it is we fear.

The more we deal in honesty with the feeling of fear, the more we befriend and see it for what it is, the more we simply are left with the strongly shaking uncomfortability of passing it with full consciousness.

A last reflection on the matter is, that the arising of fear always moves in cycles. If you want to befriend your fear, the way to go about it is to study when it occurs in you. With open curiosity and willingness to not flee from uncomfortability. Because it is always connected to a cycle. One of the moving wheels of your inner progress of moving in evolution.

So I guess that all that is left, is to ask you… Have you befriended your fear? What is your strategy for avoiding feeling the fear directly? How do you attempt to control your way out of the situation, when fear turns itself in? Welcoming you to contemplate the matter…

Kindness,
Pema

There are many aspects of the human wounding. These aspects we carry to various degrees, which shapes how we function as human beings in our less-than-free reality. It is aspects, which we need to work through, for us to be set free and emerge to the human wholeness of absorbing all wounds into the monadic body – which in turn births Grace as the very breath in and through our bodies.

To be exact the aspects of human wounding are rejection, denial, guilt, shame, repression and separation. You may want to take a moment to reflect and recognize which of these aspects are dominant in your wiring and which you do not easily recognize.

Shame

Shame is the intensely painful feeling we have, when we believe ourselves to be flawed and as the result unworthy of Love.

In the investigations of Shame, I have found, that we all carry it around to whatever degree we are willing to dim the lights on and keep ourselves from shining brightly as true self-rest.

The reflections we have had as a child has helped us shape how much of what We Are has been allowed to unfold. To release this weight of conditioning, we actually have to feel our way to the root and bottom of the constriction we are putting – as consciousness – around our solar plexus. This is fully connected to the workings around Shame – whether we feel and acknowledge it – or not!

In this way shame may not be a feeling you are accustomed to acknowledging in your emotional system, and yet it may simply dominate and shake off the twist into a load of false feelings and thoughts, dancing around the true acknowledgement of shame as on of the stronger aspects covering up your core wounding – waiting to be acknowledged and honestly Met.

When we subtly feel, that the people around us are not in celebration of the aspect of reality which we freely and naturally are here to Shine As, we automatically retract into a shell of invisible and unheard. Unseen.

We can speak of this as aspects of the human wounding, because it really is a twist naturally taken inside of us away from rest in Being, with reality, as humans, which arises as a voice of “wounded child” within us. The voice of the wounded child is not real -(there is no wounded child) – and yet, we have to be willing to Meet this voice open-arms, Listening to/being present in seeing and feeling, with its appearance within us, before it can release its illusory boundaries of being cut-off from reality, of somebodiness which pulses through our consciousness and body-space – for the release of our true sound and reality-aligned vibration as mature adults.

The mature adult is not a “something in itself” to be believed in. It is more accurately described a body aligned to the dance of the Universal and Earth vibration and which due to the lack of contracted inner voices simply hums the sound of All-inclusive Reality – instead of the vibration of the cut-off and illusory.

It can be hard to relate to these different voices without taking them seriously, but somehow we simply need to reverse our approach of Listening to the body, to one of pure Presence, of no-opinion on feelings appearing or being willing to twist or turn the aspects of our experience towards an idea of where the resolution is going. The system is Very Sensitive in that way and towards that – simply because attempts at doing will try to replace a false vibration with another invented one – instead of the real one. It needs real and true self-compassion and this cannot be faked, it is the result of our willingness to Love ourselves Truly. In this way, we can tell ourselves we are working through stuff, while actually being perpetuating the illusion behind it’s arising. It is easy to get lost in the sub-conscious.

If we approach and train ourselves as pure consciousness – through the purification of the heart in softening and sincerity, in bowing to admittance to foolishness of disagreement with What Is, we can arrive at being Helped Greatly by Grace in the healing and movement towards wholeness. But it requires our innocence. Our willingness to let go of the false and self-protective.

The different aspects of wounding holds different indications. The indications of Shame moving unseen are;

• beliefs in worthlessness
• the arising of competitiveness
• and inner creations of and belief in hierarchies

The opportunity which presents itself

An invitation stands for you to pass beyond the inner moves of deviation from and rejection of the real and natural, the whole and uncomplicated. In other words, to arrive at a true and natural belonging to what is unfolding in your Life, this needs to be tenderly but honestly approached. With an agreement to step into a life beyond addiction to the drama it creates in you.

It needs to happen for you to arrive – Right Here! – at the center of relaxation and real appreciation, in acknowledgement of yourself and other – as unity with reality – without the inner happening of neither grasping nor pushing away. Without deflating the value of the profound nor closing off or dimming the light of yourself.

The wounding flourishing and arising in you Calls to be handled with great responsibility.
You cannot become truly yourself without coming into a proper relationship with this part of you.

When Anger arises in us, what we need to know is, that although something may have set it off, the revealer is never the reason for the anger appearing in you. It is JUST the trigger. The rising of anger is never because of Something – it is Always the other way around. That we have anger in us, which reveals in response to existence showing us something, to help it flash and rise to the surface.

For this reason alone, projecting anger outwards is never the way to go. The projection of anger outwards can always ever be the result of lack of humility – of disagreement towards what is happening in life, what is asking to be met and handled in Truth.

We are standing with a whole fan of emotions here, of energies, which all have a slightly different flavour and ground. There is anger, fury, wrath, rage and aggression. Which are not the same.

Many Flavours

Rage and aggression holds the seed of our own disagreement with Life, with God. Aggression has disrespect and lack of Love in its ground. Its further development within the unconsciousness fuelling is rage. It holds the seed of manipulation – the ongoing push/pull dynamics based on hatred – and calls us to humility in a bowing and bending to the ground.

Anger, in its most honest revelation, is at the root of most of our human actions and factually speaking lies behind most of the doing we carry out on this planet. It is in fact Just a feeling and has no life of its own apart from what we give it in fear of being sincerely and simply honest about its arising. When we loose our own fear of it, it can be experienced sweetly and directly without any need to dance it into play, as a part of us being called into deeper surrender.

Fury and Wrath are different by nature. They are pure/true responses to detriment forces and are rooted in Love, in Truth, beyond the thwarted attempts to animate the pure response from Life. It is devoid of somebodiness. Fury is a feminine rising just as wrath is its masculine counterpart. Fury is like an all up-rooting cyclone, while wrath is a mountain-solid thunderbolt.

Knowing the different qualities of this energy, we can start dealing with it in more accurate ways.

Deeper Surrender – Anger Awaits

To pass into the field of Compassion, of non-violence, we will inevitably come to stand face to with face the ground of anger, which in the past has made us make moves, to change what didn’t satisfy us. Without manipulating existence in an attempt to “keep us happy”, we stand before the dissolution of a bottomline identity based on the dynamics of push and pull.

Passing through this bottomline opens the door for arrival in pure Joy, which isn’t dependent on whether things on a surface level is “like this or like that”. It brings us beyond the investments in what takes place existentially and leaves us equally happy no matter what takes place. Beyond the need to manipulate life’s movements. It isn’t equal to non-care of “whatever”, but it means we stand naked and in acceptance towards Life’s will – at every turn in life.

Embracing Anger

Anger is not dangerous. It is just a feeling. Most of us have probably learned to lock the feeling down in very early age, as a manner of our upbringing to be accepted. If we have made such an inner move around anger, we often become pleasing, when we are actually angry.

To re-open the door to anger means to dissolve the inner objection to its existence in our system. We may fear it at first, as we have never learned to have a sound and healthy relationship to it, to be able to contain it and let it transmute.

The root of anger is actually pure life-force, and in its rising we can learn to enjoy the feeling, simply by letting it be and acknowledging “the guest called Anger” is in our house (body). To enjoy it is not equal to riding on it or perpetuating it, but to innocently allow it to be as sweetly welcome, as any other feeling.

A  Technique for dissipating Aggression

A way to intelligently handle anger, as it arises in the form of a deeper calling for our surrender, is to;

• Place yourself on the edge of a chair.
• Sit with a straight back and rest your hands on your knees.
• Now close your eyes, locate the anger and keep the anger in sight, with eyes closed.
• Press the tongue against the palate of your mouth.
• Now breathe in through your nose and slowly exhale all the air via your mouth while making a long hiss-noise – like a snake. This action dissipates negativity from our system.
• Continue the breath in and hiss out until you have released the sufficient amount of anger from your system to once again have a state of relaxation through your body. Repeat as needed.

Loneliness is a reality we all have to face, to be able to Rest at the core of being straight, on ground and solidly ourselves – uncompromising to the fact of our engagement with the world and able to harvest the fruits of direct interaction with God.

The journey into the Universal Heart gives us oneness on an off-ground level, but when we travel into the core of the Human Heart we stand face to face with the fact of being “an actual physical separate unit” (a human) in the scope of it all. A SEVERELY overwhelming feeling, which calls us to attain the compassion needed to cover and fulfil our human existence and its needs – to take care of ourselves on every layer – physically, emotionally and psychologically – as we grow in and as consciousness and merge with Spirit.

On this level, our embrace, our willingness to Hold ourselves Warmly/as Love/consciously/COMPASSIONATELY allows for a strengthening of our incarnated Spirit, which in turn becomes able to walk this Earth in GREAT self-rest and depth devoid of separation from Her on and beyond ground level. In supreme certainty rather than insecurity and overall to allow for a maturation and growing up on all levels, which makes for a different reality in terms of being free to move instead of having a baseline in our lives of co-dependency.

Loneliness as a Feeling – yes, it is hard to Meet, because it is a straight-shooter towards the breaking of the heart – the final fatal Call to be Met by God, which requires our arrival AS that Love for the dissolution of the “someone apart from God”. Our somebodiness rises as these waves of feelings – but when we peel it back, we do not cling to the human feeling/experience anymore and the feeling passes unobstructed and with a sense of sweetness, since we don’t deny it and don’t delay it’s passing.

It Is challenging in the learning stages, yes, but also the alleyway to living the deeper gratitude for the reality of Simply Breathing – for God in its most Naked. A wheeling-back to the simple fact of gratitude to be alive, which roots Joy at the baseline of our human experience independent of expectation towards and investment in our human experience based on “having SOMETHING or SOMEONE to be grateful for” – of leaning forwards into our human lives to find something to be happy about, rather than finding the Real JOY based in our resting in and down.

It is an angle of severe rooting as Reality – not the feeling itself, but the way in which we have to center inside to meet and greet it, for it to dissolve into gratitude. In other words, this is why we fear it so much, because the Only way out of it, is by Meeting ourselves as Love on that bottomline where no amount of attempts to fix will do, and only compassion will rule the day – something which requires our inner rising and falling in surrender to Her.

Our straightening out of the subtle layers of identification and grasping at life as-if it equals experience is needed to deal with the subtle twists of consciousness AWAY from Joy in Simply Being. Something which we for starters will find Hard to nail, because we from the somebody-side tend to generate a huge amount of “secondary feelings” to move on top of the feeling, in panic of simply dying as ego and resting down as consciousness in the core relaxation into and through the feeling of loneliness itself.

The feeling itself is like a deepening well. Every time it wants to reveal another arrival in union with Her as severe strong-standing on-ground, we face another and deeper level of the feeling, which gets to break the Human heart even deeper.

Meeting this feeling requires an END to dancing around the fact of learning Joy as the BASIC feeling of our standing on/in this Earth as Being in body. It is extremely deep and fundamental as the learning of pure JOY (in being one with Her as the Female Spirit directly, through a growth of compassion towards our human being – making us able to rest deeeeep down and deeper, as consciousness).

With that said, I must also make it Clear, that loneliness is Also “just another human feeling on the feeling-piano” – awaiting our growth as compassion, for us to befriend it and reach the end of making a big deal out of it (as in; look at our humanity – the clinging, the compromises and co-dependence etc.).

When we reach the end of avoiding to be at home with this feeling – allowing it to pass naturally and compassionately, we will be able to navigate from what is Best for everything and will no longer hold ourselves or each other back in terms of growth and evolution, to not-feel alone etc. The world would look very different.

To work with this, requires us to move towards befriending the feeling. To learn the inner roll back of the objection towards it, and to take the heart-break Straight On and as it turns itself in. To fall in love with this feeling is not easy and yet possibly the deepest beneficial attainment, as it is the most challenging human core feeling, which deeply defies our animal instinct of survival and tests as builds the bridge into our rest in God as Her. All I can say is – the work of dissolving the objection is deeply worthwhile…

As a last word, I can confirm that it is not possible to be an awake, deep and un-manipulating being on ground in this world without facing the fact of loneliness as the natural result of being in this world which primarily moves on surface-layers of and are either in deep sleep or moving on fear and avoidance. Including this feeling – loneliness – in the repertoire of feelings that we can be happy/in Joy with/enjoy as a part of our human experience, leaves us with being able to stay in Joy – greeting this friend with the same sweetness as any other aspect of our human experience.

Deep Love,
Pema